Q: If a wife is allowed to call her husband by his name?
Ans: Praise be to Allaah.
There is nothing wrong with a woman calling her husband by his name, because there is no evidence to indicate that that is not allowed. But people’s customs and traditions should be taken into account in this matter. If the custom in some land is that a woman should call her husband by his kunya (Abu So and so) for example, and they think that calling him by his name is ill-mannered, or if the husband does not like to be called by his name, then the women should pay attention to that, because she is required to treat her husband well and it is not good treatment to call him in a manner that he dislikes or that is regarded by people as not good.
Each spouse should address the other by the name that he or she likes best, because that brings about love and affection.
Al-Manaawi said in Fayd al-Qadeer:
The etiquette of companionship: This includes:
Keeping secrets; concealing faults; not telling him about the bad things that people say about him; telling him about good things that people say about him which will make him happy; listening attentively when he is speaking; avoiding arguments; calling him by the name that he likes best; praising him for his best obvious characteristics; thanking him for favours that he does; defending him in his absence; helping him when he needs help without waiting for him to ask; advising him in a gentle and indirect manner – if he there is a need for that; forgiving him for his mistakes; not criticizing him; praying for him in private when he is alive and after he dies; expressing joy at things that make him happy and sorrow at things that make him sad; greeting him first when meeting him; making room for him in a gathering; offering your place to him; seeing him out when he leaves; listening attentively when he speaks until he has finished speaking; and in general treating him as one would like to be treated.
And Allaah knows best.
Islam Q&A, Yahoo Groups
Ans: Praise be to Allaah.
There is nothing wrong with a woman calling her husband by his name, because there is no evidence to indicate that that is not allowed. But people’s customs and traditions should be taken into account in this matter. If the custom in some land is that a woman should call her husband by his kunya (Abu So and so) for example, and they think that calling him by his name is ill-mannered, or if the husband does not like to be called by his name, then the women should pay attention to that, because she is required to treat her husband well and it is not good treatment to call him in a manner that he dislikes or that is regarded by people as not good.
Each spouse should address the other by the name that he or she likes best, because that brings about love and affection.
Al-Manaawi said in Fayd al-Qadeer:
The etiquette of companionship: This includes:
Keeping secrets; concealing faults; not telling him about the bad things that people say about him; telling him about good things that people say about him which will make him happy; listening attentively when he is speaking; avoiding arguments; calling him by the name that he likes best; praising him for his best obvious characteristics; thanking him for favours that he does; defending him in his absence; helping him when he needs help without waiting for him to ask; advising him in a gentle and indirect manner – if he there is a need for that; forgiving him for his mistakes; not criticizing him; praying for him in private when he is alive and after he dies; expressing joy at things that make him happy and sorrow at things that make him sad; greeting him first when meeting him; making room for him in a gathering; offering your place to him; seeing him out when he leaves; listening attentively when he speaks until he has finished speaking; and in general treating him as one would like to be treated.
And Allaah knows best.
Islam Q&A, Yahoo Groups
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